our treasure - the gospel

I have always been intrigued at how after his conversion to Christ, Paul did not immediately immerse himself in any ministry - he waited years and years. "But when it pleased God, who separated me from my mother's womb and called me through His grace, to reveal His Son in me, that I might preach Him among the Gentiles, I did not immediately confer with flesh and blood, nor did I go up to Jerusalem to those who were apostles before me; but I went to Arabia, and returned again to Damascus." (Gal. 1:15-17)

God Himself was Paul's one and only source. Source for good news, source for life. And Paul went away to be with Him and to appropriate (or claim) all that was his in Christ.
Given, Paul had quite the reputation as a persecutor and a murderer of any Christ-followers. It was fitting for him to take himself out of the spotlight for a while...if he had come out immediately declaring himself a believer - who would really have believed him anyway?
but Paul was more concerned about the gospel - he received the gospel from the revelation of Jesus Christ and no man...could it be that he waited so long because he wanted to get the gospel right...exactly right?

the following is not meant as "i've got all my stuff together" by any means because if you know me at all, you know that just ain't true - I'm a mess!...but I have been thinking back to what i used to believe to be true (about me, Christ, the gospel and other people) - and now I think - how did I live like that?? how miserable! does anyone else think about that? katie and i were talkin last night about how it takes TIME for truth to click with people. It's okay if I/you/we don't get it right away. Processes - understanding, healing - take time. I went through Study One two whole times before I began to really "get it". In my adolescent development class this summer, I learned that developing any new self-concept is extremely hard and takes time. Praise the Lord that we can lean on Him even when we don't understand!! "trust the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct your paths" - Proverbs 3:5,6.

don't laugh, but there is a symbollic tie between my brother David and Paul. stay with me here I promise this will make sense. When my brother gets a new toy - gadget, big truck, whatever - he loves to tinker with it. I think a lot of men do this. He likes to take it apart and see how it works and then put it back together. This is one of his joys! In my mind, I imagine Paul doing this with the gospel and with God. Paul was an extremely intelligent man and probably loved to know the ins and outs of everything! Maybe like my brother, Paul took his new "treasure", went away, and immersed himself in it and then, when he felt ready, took it out for a spin (so to speak).

"the kingdom of heaven [or the gospel] is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid; and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field." - Matthew 13:44

tha beech

Oh the beach. the sand. the waves. the smell of salted air. and RED TIDE. has anyone heard of
this? this was my "something new" in the "you learn something new every day" for the weekend. me and my peeps went to my sister's lovely beachhouse this weekend to enjoy some rest, relaxation, and football. as we strolled down the street towards the beach, we begin to feel the urge to cough. and it became stronger. we had begun to experience this evil little phenomenon called Red Tide - some sort of substance that comes from algae (I think) that gets stirred up by hurricanes at this time of the year - made its way into our lungs! apparently, this stuff is semi-toxic. but we didn't let it beat us - by Saturday morning, we were out on the beach like champs playin football, throwin the frisbee - enjoying life, enjoying Him.

Regardless of the evil RED TIDE, we had a blast this weekend. Good fellowship, perfect weather, amazing house, great food, intense football, and a very good God. I was so glad to spend some time with new friends Michelle and Melissa. It blesses my heart how Father created women in His image and how we have such a unique relationship with each other as sisters in Christ. We have such tender hearts; we're servants, we're sensitive, we're perceptive, we are detail-oriented and we are nesters - just like our Father.

"God's heart is the most sensitive and tender of all. No act goes unnoticed, no matter how insignificant or small. A cup of cold water is enough to put tears in the eyes of God. Like the proud mother who is thrilled to receive a bouquet of wilted dandelions from her child, so God celebrates our feeble expressions of gratitude" - Brennan Manning

The prayer of my heart lately has been that I would be more tender and compassionate. Most of the time I don't FEEL like that way but I will choose to believe that because Jesus is in me and that I am full of the Spirit of Christ that tenderness and compassion overflows in me. Thank you Jesus that not only do you have a dangerous, wild, and limitless love for us, but also a tender love, a compassionate love, a detailed love.


"the heart of the Spirit-filled person overflows with tenderness" - B. Manning


"and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you." - Ephesians 4:32

the most beautiful fall day ever!

What a gorgeous day it was here! I absolutely love October! I started my day with Jesus and breakfast outside at this adorable bakery called Edgar's. It was perfect - the air was crisp, the sky was clear, and while the sun was warm, the soft gentle breeze kept it cool.
Do you ever wake up feeling so excited about all of the things you want to do with a day of freedom that you can't decide what to do first? Today was a day like that for me. I think I've decided that sleeping just takes up too much time!! There are so many wonderful things I want to do every day - but who has the time? GEEZ. Yet my heavenly Father reminds me that rest is always needed - physically and spiritually. So I propped up my feet, put down my journal and pen, closed my eyes and breathed in, breathed out, breathed in, breathed out. How wonderful it was to be still before Him with a clear mind and a light heart! And then the Words of the Lord spoke to me through the music playing on the radio at Edgar's.

More than you know
Girl of my heart, I love you so
Lately I find, you're on my mind
More than you know
Loving you the way that I do
There's nothing I can do about it...
I'll love you more than you know
-Frank Sinatra

"rejoice oh daughter of God, He will sing songs over you..."

"let your soul delight itself in abundance" - Is. 55:2d

"cause me to hear your lovingkindness in the morning, for in You do I trust; Cause me to know the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You." - Psalm 143:8

"Define yourself radically as one beloved by God. This is the true self. Every other identity is illusion." - Brennan Manning

silly-ness

One thing I love about being a girl is that when we get together we can be just so silly!! (not that you boys don't have a good time...it's just different!) My precious roomie (Sara Fletcher) and I are always doing something dumb! I bought this fart machine back in the spring (yes, i did and keri anne, katieb, peter, ashley and I had some good times with that during community groups) laugh! Sometimes Sara and I will wake each other up with the fart machine. Of course it always starts our day out right. What a way to wake up!! FERRRRRR! ;0 Don't be grossed out - see a lot of boys I know would actually just fart! Girls are more civilized. We use fart machines. hahaha.
Even though Sara and I love to watch Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice - I was just thinkin how wonderful it is that our society is not the way it was anymore (for the most part). Propriety pretty much bothers me. Goofy is my middle name. I'd rather be silly and get laughed at. One of my favorite songs is by Patty Griffin and I think it's about having fun, letting go, taking chances, and just enjoying life!

Let's take a ride to the seaside
We can go out swimming in the high tide
Just wear your shorts and your long hair
Don't forget the lawn chair
Everybody's gone to the movies
Everybody's gone and its groovy
They went to the one about the big war I didn't,
I'd seen it before

I guess I'm taking my chances
Giving up the ring throwing in the gloves
I guess I'm taking my chances
Trading in my things
A couple wings on a little white dove
And one big love, one big love

Everybody do like a Monkey
If you want to go on and be funky
No need to talk like a hero
Talk a walk count down to zero
No sense defending your honor
Just go on and kiss him if you wanna
Everything before is gone or is going somewhere

I guess I'm taking my chances
Giving up the ring throwing in the gloves
I guess I'm taking my chances
Trading in my things for a couple wings on a Little white dove
And one big love
one big love

I don't know where we are
And I don't care
And now we're out of gas
And riding on air
And one big love, one big love

pinhole camera fun

Undo Me

Sometimes I feel so simple-minded yet by the grace of God wisdom and understanding are ours! Thank you Jesus that you love to freely dispense wisdom to all who seek it! I was listening to a song by Dan Dyer (for all of you lovers of obscure musicians...he's a good one!) tonight and the Lord deepened my understanding of sanctification.

Here's the lyrics to part of the song:

"Why are we so afraid
To go lay down in the river?
Wash away everything
So we can be delivered"

the river is the WORD of God, the truth...it is living and active. As we immerse ourselves into the river of life, Jesus, the Word, we are cleansed! - but wait a sec, aren't we already clean? aren't we already justified and have peace with God through Christ? YES! The word cleanses and renews our minds -washing away old patterns -flesh patterns, LIES that have been implanted, etc. Once we renew our minds (Romans 12:1,2) we are restored back to who we truly are - clean, new, loved children of God.

Last thought - why are we so afraid? what is there to fear? why don't we go LAY DOWN (rest) in this water, river of life?? the TRUTH will UNDO US....hmmm. sounds scary! Another word for undo (verb) is free (verb). Like Lazarus, Jesus calls us forth, DELIVERS us out of our old burial rags to be undone and reveal a new, alive, FREE self. yesssssssss!

I'll end this ole post with a great quote from Abba's Child by Brennan Manning..."in solitude we tune out the nay-saying whispers of our worthlessness and sink down into the mystery of our true self."